Erik Quinn: The Heart of a Family: Thin Skin

Saturday, December 27, 2008

Thin Skin

Should I yank the videos and the photos of Erik off the internet as his disability becomes more apparent and his appearance becomes just a little more unusual with each passing year? Do I let strangers who hurt me with their horrible comments win, or do I learn to ignore them? Can I at least think of a snappy retort or two? I am in need of much thicker skin. I knew the risks when I decided to share Erik with the world. I thought I was ready, but the game is always changing on me.

I know I am tougher than I used to be, but I have a horribly long way to go.

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12 Comments:

Blogger Life's a peach said...

Nancy, don't let them get you down, Erik is an inspiration to so many of us, as are you, there are rotten apples in all walks of life but you chuck em out, don't let them spoil the whole barrel. Happy Christmas and the best New Year

2:50 PM  
Blogger Little Warrior's Mom said...

Nancy, you're the only one who can decide, but please keep in mind that by keeping the photos and videos up, you are introducing WS to so many people ... you are making it more normal.

I began putting up videos of Little Warrior because I felt that people saw kids with cancer as separate creatures than "normal" kids. Like they were born bald and skinny. I wanted people to see that "normal" kids can become cancer kids.

Seeing Erik doing regular things -- birthdays, playing, etc -- makes it more normal.

Anyway, you're the only one who can decide -- just weighing in with my .02, which isn't even worth that much.

Oh, and ... as great a writer as you are, I KNOW you can come up with the perfect squelching put-down! Something that points out that the commenter has displayed more of his/her disability than anything else!

Merry Christmas, Friend.

3:12 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I am a lurker who found this from another site (I don't remember whose).

I can't believe someone would put a nasty comment on your blog.

But I have to echo Little Warrior's Mom--I never knew about WS until this blog, and some of the things I've read here are the best things I've ever read on the internet.

I can understand if you decide to make your blog more private, but I want to tell you thank you for posting your thoughts and photos. I feel like I'm more informed because of you and your willingness to share a part of your life with us.

I feel like because of you and your son, I am more accepting of other people's differences and perspectives. People with WS definitely seem "normal" to me.

Hugs,
Anon

4:46 PM  
Blogger Gina said...

Awww Nancy, don't let those ignorant people get you down-I so love your blog and hope one day to meet you and Erik:)You are stronger than you know-hang in there!
Gianna's Mommy

8:49 PM  
Blogger Ava Jewel Leilani said...

It sounds so easy when I say don't listen to them Nancy but we all know it is so much harder to do. I am sorry that someone's words made your heart ache. Know that we love looking at your pictures and videos of Erik and of course you ;) He does as you inspire so many! PS I don't think your thin skin at all.

9:29 PM  
Blogger Laura said...

I don't think we could ever grow a thick enough skin when it comes to our children. What does happen, is the realization that those who post these disgusting comments are the cowards, and don't even deserve the energy it takes to be angry or hurt by their ignorance.
Whenever one of these nasty comments comes across my videos of Michaela on Youtube...I take great satisfaction in deleting it...then I read all the postive comments, which are by far, more numerous than the negative ones.
Keep sharing that amazing boy of yours....I just love seeing his beautiful face.

5:14 AM  
Blogger Ava's Grandma Kim said...

Ok, this may be redundant, but I remember feeling so very grateful to find blogs and videos of WS kids right after Ava was diagnosed. I was desperate to see what we were up against, and your blog/pics/videos were so comforting to me. It was then that I realized WS is NOT the end of the world.

Don't give up, Nance. You are providing a valuable service. More valuable than you know.

Love, Kim

7:15 AM  
Anonymous Auntie CInnamon~ said...

What is going on Nance? People are leaving horrible comments on your blog about my nephew??? I am pissed! Cowards!!! What would happen if we were to run into them in a parking lot or alley way? I think we would be bringing out the can of whip ass! Noooo I know we would be... okay at least this Auntie would be!!! Where are you, you little pond slithering coward!

Or we could just chuck bad apples AT these cowards!!

Always-Always in your corner girl!
Dawnita~

9:29 AM  
Blogger Tara said...

Hey Nancy. I do not understand people at all. Obviously they are complete jerks. Throwing in my two cents, I cannot tell you how comforting it is to be able to see pictures of Eric, see videos, and read all of your thoughts. Not only does it make me feel like Payton fits in perfectly, but it makes ME feel normal as a special needs parent. So many times I just crave someone understanding our situation and all I have to do is read the blogs and I feel right at home.
Love you, Nancy.
Tara

7:10 PM  
Blogger CP said...

You have a beautiful son, who cares if he looks a bit different from other children? I think that someone would leave you mean comments just shows why you should keep sharing your story. The ignorant ones can learn a great deal about compassion through your reading and parents with children who don't have any disabilities see the struggle you endure and still see the joy you have in your son. We can see how lucky we might be to have children considered "normal" but learn how truly special Erik is. He is an inspiration as you are and it would be a shame to let a few ignorant people stop the world from knowing him better, and you as well.

9:43 PM  
Blogger Julie said...

Your videos are how I found you guys. That said you only know what is best for you and your little guy. I have not had to deal with anything like this, yet. I am sure any thick skin I have will diminish when that time comes.

5:57 AM  
Blogger Tes said...

I am with Dawnita!! That crap just burns me up,the sting my heart takes isn't s*^)T compared to what I could do to you, you "perfect" person. I think your nose is too big, your eyes are too small, you have thinning hair and your fingers and toes are toooo skinny, so skinny they are creepy like a RATs, oh that is because you are one" crawl back to your safe garbage filled cave.

Nancy don't you DARE give in. We got your back sista!

9:44 AM  

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